I’m gonna kick your ass… You’re probably living the fucking life right now and i’m going through all this stress just so you can be happy… you’re like the only motivation that keeps me going everyday really, just the thought of you being well off. welp i know one day we’re gonna meet. And you have a shit memory so you probably won’t remember this day in the future but your dad sent you a text saying “Work Hard Play Harder” putting up a peace sign in a construction helmet lol. You had a nasty ass valentines day too, you probably don’t even wanna remember that lol. And you almost crashed your car on the way to the gym today yelling lyrics to some ludacris song lol. Divines coming over for a week in a week lol. You really wanna get back into school and your mom’s pressuring you to goto some 1 year music institute before they start charging you for loans.. Every one you know either fell victim to mediocrity or bullshitting and it’s killing you to be the only one to keep hope alive.. but i know if i still want you to exist i gotta be strong as hell. Where ever you are right now, I hope you’re saying grace at a big ass table with grilled fish and a strawberry smoothie in a tall ass glass watching the fresh prince. I hope all of my friends are with you too.
Dear Past me,
You’re kicking my ass right now.. I’m dealing with a bunch of problems i should’ve handled back then when you were alive instead of holding them off so present me can deal with them. I still got that blue hoodie you used to always have sex, the lucky one, it’s somewhere hanging up. That college shit was fucking bullshit. you were right. but I’m gonna jump back in because it’s looking like a dead end right now. Alot of the goals we sat down and put together got stomped out by time. Didn’t meet the right dead lines and i have no one else to blame. But hey.. through all that bullshit, you’re still just as charismatic. Matter fact, there’s people that blow your phone up often just because they want you in their life, they need that positivity and stuff to brighten them up… I mean you’re still an asshole yeah but you toned down alot lol. You stopped selling drugs too, it got kind’ve pointless, started to become a hobby and not a necessity anymore. your mom moved out the hood and you haven’t had a home since. You still fucking love apple sauce too, and pretzels. But when you find out what Chick-Fil-A is, you’re going to spend 1/4 of $1000 on it in one summer. and you’re not even gonna realize it.
when i say i hate school it doesn’t mean i hate education and knowledge. it means that i hate selfish and ignorant people there. it means that i hate stress and high expectations. it means that i hate being treated like a shit. it fucking means that i hate feeling like a failure all the time.